Jungle Cruise

 Or how to take a simple boat ride at an amusement park and turn it into something 20 times more exciting.  This is not Raiders of the Lost Arc, The Mummy or Pirates of the Caribbean Parts 1, 2, 3, or 4, but it is reminiscent of several bits in all of these series.  This can be a blessing or a curse, fortunately, it’s a blessing and in the words of Maui, You’re welcome.  I would have never thought to put Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson and Emily Blunt together in an action film, and this one has a lot of action, but it works, so well that watching it repeatedly isn’t like taking a three hour tour and getting lost.  Nope we’re going for the gold, or in this case, the cure for everything and the gold would be at the box office, streaming and disc sales, and a renewed interest in Disneyland. 

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip, that started from this tropic port, aboard this tiny ship.  There is a millionaire-brother MacGregor, but no wife, a Skipper, but no first mate, a Professor, but it’s Lillian, not Mary Ann…and we’re on a tributary of the Amazon instead of a tropic port.  Instead of a movie star there’s a Prince Joachim (Jesse Plemmons) and Paul Giamatti as Nilo, who owns the Minnow, I mean La Quila, his bird says it all, “Frank owes me money” and is part of the reason for the cruise. The puns are endless and the banter between Frank and Lilly actually works.  Add in some surprises, twists and turns and a frank discussion of someone’s life dilemma and you’ve got a winner that’s ready for a sequel.  Rating:  A Toucan, A Cockatoo, A Jaguar, and a Couple of Swigs of Amazon White Lighting (it’s disgusting, but potent).